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Positive Living: It's Time To Let Go!


What kind of emotional baggage(s) are you carrying, that seems to be holding you back? Think for a moment of the things that are wearing you down for they come in all sorts of packages. They have many faces. We carry them around; we store them in the remotest part of our brain; in the deepest chambers of our hearts. We have them in the extensive database of our memories. Some are so close to the heart, that they bring out tears at the slightest provocation.

Others may feel anger, very deep resentment and may exhibit anti-social or antagonistic behaviour. What is it that you need to let go of?
Is it shadows that follow and haunt many in dreams, waking hours or in unlikely places, or is it unexpected and intimidating uncontrollable anger that can lead to violence and can explode without warning.
Others will live in denial and spend their lives disconnected with the real world. Some will find blame in everyone else except themselves. It is always the other person's fault. Many are lost searching for something they cannot identify. Something is missing. A lot of lonely faces can be seen on the streets, sitting in public places, in schools, in the workplace or gathering at churches perhaps to seek solace.
Emotional excess baggage demands a high price. It manifests itself in many kinds of diseases. There are those who succumb to the weight of this burden when it gets too much to bear. They find no further reason to keep up the fight. Life loses its luster, the world seems cruel and existence meaningless.
There are many who go through life adrift, letting the current take them wherever. It does not seem to matter anymore but it need not be so my friend. Today can be the day to say good bye to it. Let it go and set yourself free. Free from the pain of the past and ready to embrace the possibilities of the future.
You may be wondering - what are some of those baggages that are causing emotional suffering and holding us captive. Some of those include: Broken dreams, broken relationships, failed careers, lost hopes, betrayals, violations and childhood or other trauma. Social disgrace, financial disaster, poverty and addictions cast deep emotional scars to the most vulnerable members of the family and society.
Can you identify with any of those in your personal lives? You see, one of the most painful things we have to do in our lives is letting go. We have to tell ourselves the past is past, it is gone, it is history. We cannot undo what is already done. We cannot change the past but we can change the future. In order to move forward, we need to have closure on past experiences before we can start anew. Letting go is not easy but it is necessary. It calls for emotional strength and courage.
Sometimes it is letting go of things...material things which mean a lot to us, because of sentimental value. Sometimes it may be letting go of feelings – deep seated hurt. Sometimes we hold sadness inside and try to mask it with a show of happiness, but it is better to feel the sadness and allow it to wash through us then let it go.
Sometimes, it is letting go of someone we care for very deeply when we realize that person does not care for us in the same way. Sometimes it is letting go of loved ones who have passed on. Sometimes it is letting go of fear. For example, there are occasions when we feel something wonderful for someone, but we don’t express it for fear of being rejected. Sometimes our feelings will be rejected. Yet, what if we withhold it from the one person who could very well be that One Special Someone in our lives and he/she too has been afraid to express his/her true feelings, or don’t even realize his/her true feelings yet! How sad that we may miss The Best for fear of Letting Go of the expression of those feelings.
One of the best things to do in our lives is letting go of anger and hurt caused by others. We need to find it in our hearts to forgive lovingly. The anger and hurt we hold inside only poison us, and cause us to allow that person or persons to control our feelings.
It is best that you do not get into another relationship until you heal the wounds of your past. Carrying baggage into another relationship can be detrimental. So what are you struggling with my friend? What do you need to let go of? Search your heart. It is inventory time. Read through the list to see what exactly you need to discard or let go of.
Is it selfishness, self-pity, self-righteousness, negativity, a judgmental spirit, perfectionism, boastfulness, bad attitudes, deceitfulness, greed, malice, hatred, laziness, anger, resentment, bitterness, arrogance, pride, envy, jealousy, prejudice, gossip, stress, worry, annoyances, negative friends, dead relationships, abusive relationships, obligations, covetousness, dead end jobs, meddling in-laws, self-blame, hurt feelings, disappointments, unforgiveness, rejection, drugs, alcohol or an addiction of any kind? Or is it the heavy baggage of “ shoulda, coulda, woulda” that is pulling you down instead and robbing you of your peace of mind, joy and aliveness that you once had?
You see, when we stop trying to grasp, own, and control the world around us, we give it the freedom to fulfill us without the power to destroy us. That’s why letting go is so important: letting go is letting happiness in.
It’s no simple undertaking to let go of things that feel familiar or were being nursed for a long time. Neither is it a one-time decision, like pulling off a band-aid. Instead, it’s a day-to-day, moment-to-moment commitment that involves changing the way we experience and interact with everything we instinctively want to grasp or hold on to.
The best approach to letting go is to start simple, at the beginning, and work your way forward until it no longer controls your life. A good cry can be the starting point – can be a great cleanser. You see, unless and until we have figured out everything to get closure, we will never live life fully or go into another relationship with a fresh and clean heart, mind , expectancy and attitude.
If you are willing to let go at this very moment of that thing that is bothering you or holding you captive, congratulations to you! Bear in mind that it is not easy, but there are practical ways to let go of your past and move on. Before you delve into letting go and saying good-bye to your past, however, you may need to face your memories and experiences. If you're dealing with your mistakes, you'll certainly have to accept responsibility for your actions.
Here are some steps that will assist you in letting go of your past:
1. Write, talk, draw, paint, or otherwise tap into your thoughts and memories. Letting go of your past means honouring your memories.
2. Let go of the emotions and feelings of painful memories by letting them wash over you – you'll feel horrible during, but relieved and peaceful afterwards. Let go of your past by reliving it.
3. Go back and talk to the people involved, if possible. Letting go of your past can mean going back.
4. Share your real feelings; confess if it's appropriate. Letting go of your past means expressing your emotions. If you have to deal with your mistakes, then own up to your shame or guilt.
5. Apologize and ask forgiveness if you need to. Letting go of your past means being vulnerable.
6. Get help with uncontrollable urges to overeat. Letting go of your past means burying your pride.
If there are any other areas in your life that you want to change but may be resisting, this may help - List the pros and cons of each change. Acknowledge any feelings you may have about letting go. Though some losses are thrust upon us, letting go can be something we choose to do. Whether loss involves losing someone to an illness, or a tragic accident or changing jobs or moving to a new location, it will involve letting go of tangible rewards as well as the possibilities of what might have been.
In a nutshell, here is what letting go is all about:-
• To "let go" does not mean to stop caring.
• To "let go" is not to cut myself off.
• To "let go" is not to admit powerlessness.
• To "let go" is not to try to change or blame another.
• To "let go" is not to care for, but to care about.
• To "let go" is not to fix, but to be supportive.
• To "let go" is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.
• To "let go" is not to be in the middle, arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own destinies.
• To "let go" is not to deny, but to accept.
• To "let go" is not to nag, scold, or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.
• To "let go" is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.
• To "let go" is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
• To "let go" is to fear less and to love more.
— Author Unknown

There are things that we never want to let go of, people we never want to leave behind. But keep in mind that letting go isn’t the end of the world. It’s the beginning of a new life.
We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us.
Remember - Letting go doesn’t mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be. Some think it's holding on that makes one strong; sometimes it's just letting go.




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